I started real life on Monday, beginning my first full-time job. I'm a grown up now, with a job and a car and a commute and a 401k (or at least, that's what people keep telling me). Since I got back from New Zealand I realized that you never really can anticipate what the next step will feel like. We devoted a whole week to "returning home" and it was still a shock when I went to flush a normal toilet and throw away plastic wrap. Plus, buying a car actually made me feel less free and more tied down (yeah, that's right. Listen to your parents, cars are a big responsibility).
I've always thought that I was pretty good at appreciating what I have when I have it. My final semester at Eastern I told myself to love my 8 am class because in just a few months my one hour 8 am class would be an 8 hour 8 am class. But the truth is, anticipating the 'bad' things about the future doesn't actually make us appreciate the present more, it just makes us dread the future. And there is no use wishing that today was like yesterday, or any other day in the past.
Life is dynamic and that's what makes it so exciting and interesting. There are surprises, for good and bad, and I don't want to spend my life trying to ruin those surprises by anticipating them. What fun would life be if we knew everything that would happen? In a few months, when I move out, I will probably look back and miss the days my mom did the dishes (and everything else). But I will let that day come and give it no more thought-when a new stage of my life begins I want to feel all the good and bad it brings for the first time. And I don't want to be stuck in the past and miss out on all the great stuff that is happening now. The great thing about life changing is that it brings amazing, new experiences that we couldn't anticipate even if we tried.
So here's the thing, this past week has been my official introduction to 'real life'. But the truth is, the more time I spend missing the past and fearing the future the less I really live. The more time you spend analyzing, predicting, missing, reminiscing, the less time you spend living. There is a time and a place for those things, but most of the time the best thing you can do is really experience the moment you are in (at least I think so). No one misses the moments they sat around worrying about the future anyway.
So my goals? Love and appreciate where I am, when I am there. Take opportunities when I see them. Be prepared, but stay naive. And try to be asleep by 10pm.
